Umami Burger – For Rappers By Ninjas

Posted on 01/23/2010 by Rev

Umami Burger
http://www.umamiburger.com
850 South La Brea Avenue
Los Angeles, CA 90036

THE CONQUEST
After 3 days in some of the worst rain LA has ever experienced, we were dying for some dry weather and sunshine. What better way to do it than an out door Burger Conquest with our friends Ash and Shawn from Sumerian Records! People have been blowing me up for sometime about the new LA burger chain Umami Burger and the curiosity needed to kill the cow.

Umami was started by wine expert Adam Fleischman and has quickly grown into 3 locations. What’s up with the name you ask? While it does sound like the name of an elite Japanese Ninja assassins cartel, it is actually a word for a particular flavor reaction. According to Umamiinfo.com “umami is a pleasant savoury taste imparted by glutamate, a type of amino acid, and ribonucleotides, including inosinate and guanylate, which occur naturally in many foods including meat, fish, vegetables and dairy products. As the taste of umami itself is subtle and blends well with other tastes to expand and round out flavors, most people don’t recognize umami when they encounter it, but it plays an important role making food taste delicious.” Beef naturally has high levels of the stuff and it’s part of what makes us want to partake in the “Glorious Pursuit of Delicious Burgers.”

THE BURGER
I really wanted a beer and was initially let down to find out Umami does not server any. They do however have a VERY long list of unique sodas and among them, one of my favorites, Australian Ginger Beer. While we sipped on our sodas out came the perfectly rectangular and crunchy triple-cooked Hand Cut fries as well as the Malt Liquor Tempura Onion Rings. The fries were good but the onion rings were among the best I have ever had. For those of you not familiar with Malt Liquor, allow me to explain.

Malt Liquor’s creation was based on making an affordable malted barley beer with a higher alcohol content. Typically sugar is added to the malt which helps to achieve these golds. It’s more commonly served in larger quantities in a 40 ounce bottles. Due to it’s low price, unique taste, intense effects frequent appearance in hip-hop videos, most people see this a beverage designed for a lower class. For those of us that enjoy the malted beverage for what it is know that it gets you crunked up right quick! When it comes to cooking, the alcohol burns off when cooked and the high levels of sugar and malt can add an intense flavor to food. Having said all of that, let me tell you, these were some damn tasty onion rings. Thankfully we got them to split so as to save room for the burgers.

I went with the “Hatch” Burger; 4 types of green chiles and house cheese. Green chiles are one of those not too often found burger toppings that all the critics love. They have a nice tangy flavor but aren’t really hot. When I see them on a menu, I always lean towards ordering them and today was to be no exception. That and the server told me it was the best burger on the menu. When Adam designed the burger at Umami, he was inspired by the attributes of burgers from In-N-Out and Father’s Office.

Cooked on a griddle, the hand made patty is loose and falls apart upon impact. The beef has a very naturally mild flavor and is seasoned with salt and pepper. The homemade cheese (most items at Umami are homemade in the restaurant) is a gooey and buttery cloud of taste sensation. Packed on top of the hatch chiles, it provides a pallet that pulls the flavors together. It’s all piled between a Portuguese style roll that has a hint of sweetness and is toasted before it’s served. The sturdy roll is an important counter balance to the loose and melting items inside.The entire package was clearly put together by a burger lover for burger lovers.


7 out of 10 ounces
-Rev Ciancio


Posted in Burgers, California, Gourmet Burgers, Hamburgers, Los Angeles | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 10 Comments

Grill ‘Em All Truck – Patty In The Parking Lot

Posted on 01/22/2010 by Rev

Grill ‘Em All Truck
http://grillemalltruck.com/
Los Angeles, CA

THE CONQUEST
Outside of my wife and family, my life is about 2 things; music and food. When the 2 come together, it’s a magical moment. It’s the reason why I like taking bands out for burgers. As I was planning my trip out to LA to see the Cancer Bats play the Henry Fonda Theater, Scott from the band (who took me out for the venison burger that changed my life) hit me up and asked “Have you heard of the Grill ‘Em All Truck?” Little did Scott know that I was already talking to Matt and Ryan from Grill ‘Em All about throwing a little burger shindig!

Let’s jump in the Delorean and go back a couple of months. A friend emails me a link to a story on Grub Street about a new burger truck in LA that serves heavy metal themed burgers. Moments later I am composing an email to Matt Chernus and Ryan Harkins, the 2 men behind the Grill ‘Em All Truck (the name is a pun on a Metallica album called “Kill ‘Em All”.) They write me back and I am absolutely flattered to hear they are fans of the Burger Conquest site. We knew we had to do something together and it was just a matter of time.

Matt and Ryan, having played in bands with each other both decided to hell with past career moves and wanted to bring together their 2 biggest passions, food and heavy metal. Thus was born the Grill ‘Em All Truck. You can find the truck roaming around LA serving up gourmet burgers named after heavy metal bands. Try the burger named after Polish black metallers “Behemoth“; “grilled cheese buns, smoked cheddar, apple wood smoked bacon, beer soaked onions.” Veggies fear not, you can order the burger dedicated to the British vegetarian thrash metal band “Carcass”; “veggie pattie, guacamole, pico de gallo, frizzled onions.” Be sure to get an order of the “H100s” to go along with your burger. They are tater tots served with a 3 cheese, roasted garlic dipping sauce.

The truck is always on the go but you can find them but checking their upcoming locations on their website and twitter. You can also book them to cater your private events and parties. If you’re Burger Conquest and the Cancer Bats, you design your burger and invite your fans to enjoy the burger with you after your show. Available with a beef or veggie patty, the “Cancer Bats” burger comes topped with a pineapple, “Grandma’s” BBQ sauce, bacon and cheddar. If you’re the Rev, trying just one of these burgers was not going to be enough.

THE BURGER
The “Cancer Bats” burger was really good. The mix of smoky BBQ sauce, tangy cheddar, salty bacon and and juicy beef created a food mosh pit between a soft white bun. From the look on people’s faces, they agreed!

While I love a crucial food hang with the dudes in the Bats, I have to admit, I was all about sucking down a “Molly Hatchet” burger; “seared fennel smoked sausage gravy, apple wood smoked bacon, maple drizzle.” Words can not describe the anticipation and excitement that was welling up inside me to try this glorious concoction. There is a reason why chocolate covered pretzels are so popular, the tantalizing mix of sweet and salty. It’s the secret that drives people wild about peanut butter. As a trained chef, Ryan knows this and it was with this knowledge that he created the “Molly Hatchet.” The flavors just exploded as I bit into it, overwhelming my taste bands and brain. It was that same euphoric feeling you get when you’re at an Iron Maiden concert and they rip into “Number of the Beast.” While I have never been a huge fan of the band Molly Hatchet, this burger was so frikkin’ awesome, it made me want to celebrate their entire catalog!

“Can’t think of a better way to top a fantastic night……first my band Cancer Bats played one of our best shows ever in LA, had a ton of fun, kids went crazy in huge circle pits and we all had huge smiles on our faces after….only to turn into an amazing heavy metal parking lot rager complete with a heavy metal burger truck! As if this couldn’t get any better, the Grill ’em All Truck made an honorary Cancer Bats burger!

With cheddar cheese, bacon, grilled pineapple and BBQ sauce this was easily the best burger I’ve ever tasted coming from a food truck! The pineapple complimented this delicious banquet burger so well every time myself or a friend would take a bite it would be followed by a chorusing “this is SOOO GOOD!”. Simply delicious and so big the Rev had to finish for me! Also some of the best french fries I’ve tried in LA and the cheese filled tater tots seriously blew my mind! If you’re in LA you must find the burger truck and order a Cancer Bats burger!”
9 out of 10 ounces
-Scott Middleton, Cancer Bats

Between meeting Matt and Ryan, watching one of my bands eat a burger named after them and trying one of the most unique burger creations on the planet, I have to say; I think the Grill ‘Em All Truck could be a shoe in for my top 12 in 2010!


8 out of 10 ounces
-Rev Ciancio





Posted in Burgers, California, Food Truck, Gourmet Burgers, Grill Em All, Hamburgers, Los Angeles | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

The Apple Pan – A Daily Habit

Posted on 01/21/2010 by Rev

The Apple Pan
http://www.applepan.com/
10801 W. Pico Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90064

THE CONQUEST
My business partner Adam and I were in Los Angeles on a business trip. One of our bands, Shadows Fall, was performing on Fuel TV’s Daily Habit and we stopped by the studio to watch them perform. The episode airs on Friday, February 5th at 9 pm EST. Once the taping was over, the guys loaded up their gear onto the bus and headed off for the first date of their current tour.

Adam looked at me and said “I’m hungry.” Although our next meeting was to be over lunch, I looked back at Adam and without missing a beat replied “I know exactly what to do. We’re 0.9 miles away from solving your problem.”

THE BURGER
A few minutes later we arrived at one of my all time favorite burger jams, The Apple Pan. Open since April 11, 1947, they serve a very simple menu made of burgers, pies, tuna salad, fries and drinks. No frills, no fuss, no over thinking. Just wait for a seat to open and place your order.

Knowing we were going to be eating again soon, Adam and I kept it simple; 1 Hickory burger each. Everything is made right in front of you as the counter wraps around the very busy grill. The burgers come wrapped in wax paper, no plate. Grab a wad of napkins because the bad boy is a messy one!

The burger is made of fine quality beef and topped with the freshest condiments and bun. The difference here is the hickory sauce which is like a smoky ketchup / BBQ sauce combo. Why they don’t bottle and sell it is beyond me. The burger was just enough to leave us satisfied but not kill us for the 2nd lunch.

If I worked at Fuel TV, the Apple Pan would become my Daily Habit!
Click here for our full review of The Apple Pan.


9 out of 10 ounces
-Rev Ciancio


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Del Taco – What Would You Do For a Taco With French Fries

Posted on 01/20/2010 by Rev

Del Taco
http://www.deltaco.com/
6768 Santa Monica Boulevard
Los Angeles, CA 90038

THE CONQUEST
The first Del Taco opened in 1961, one year before the other guys. Although both began in California, only one of them made it all the way to my home state of Michigan. As a teen, I spent a lot of expendable income mowing down cheap tacos. But many years later, I finally made my way to California where I was introduced to the fast food delight known as Del Taco.

What makes Del Taco different? In a California, drive-thru, fast-food culture based around burgers and tacos, Del Taco offers both on the same menu. Not enough to entice you? The menu also offers french fries, chili, breakfast and cake…yes CAKE!

With nearly every visit to the LA area since 1996, I have made a stop at Del Taco. It’s utterly fantastic fast food with American and authentic Mexican food items as well. And let’s be honest, french fries with tacos? That is like peanut butter and jelly, beer and hot wings, ice cream and hot fudge, pork chops and apple sauce…OK maybe not that last one. But seriously, hot crinkle cut fries and tacos…it’s a match made in fast food heaven. Get some, put them in your taco and enjoy the love.

I have seen menu items come and go, the addition of Del Inferno Sauce, the sale to Sagittarius Brands and more. But the one thing I have NEVER done? Eaten the Del Taco burger.

THE BURGER
Del Taco is good all times of the day but it’s especially tasty when one has sampled a few adult beverages. With a few bubbling around in my belly, I got me the craving for Del Taco. The order, 1 chicken soft taco, small fries and a cheese burger. The burger is made of 100% pure beef, served on a sesame seed bun with cheese, pickles and ketchup. Not a fan of the last two condiments, I ordered without.

With much pressure to live up to my own personal hype, I took a bite of the burger. While the bun was fresh, it was too much or perhaps the patty was too little as the bun to beef ratio was off. The cheese was your standard American cheese product of which I am a big fan. It’s salty, greasy, fatty and it’s bad for you but it tastes so good. The patty itself was small, overly salted and dry. While I hoped for some kind of burger victory, it just couldn’t live up to the tacos.

Now before you go get all turned off, realize that I mean no harm in this post. I love Del Taco for their tacos, burritos, french fries and especially their breakfast menu items. I just wouldn’t rank the burger on a must get basis but saying that, you must get everything else! Be a real fatso and line your tacos or burritos with fries. Skip the ketchup and be sure to lather on a packet or two of the Del Scorcho or the hotter Del Inferno . For fast food hot sauce, it’s the best. In fact, I usually snag a whole handful of packets and take them home for adorning other food times.

Although there are now 6 locations in Michigan, I now live in NYC and am praying for the day they open a Del Taco here. Click here to sign the official Burger Conquest petition to bring Del Taco to the East coast.


6 out of 10 ounces
-Rev Ciancio


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In-N-Out Burger – Create a Base

Posted on 01/20/2010 by Rev

In-N-Out Burger
http://www.in-n-out.com/
4444 Van Nuys Boulevard
Sherman Oaks, CA 91403-2908

THE CONQUEST
Burgers are a miracle cure. Well, maybe they can’t get you over the common cold or prevent cancer but they sure can help you out in a pinch. While in LA on a business trip, Adam and I were running around town, going from meeting to meeting. We really didn’t have time for a meal and en route to a drinks hang at Big Wang’s Wings, we pulled into an In-N-Out drive-thru. I knew we were in for shots, big beers, wings and the like and needed to get something in our stomachs before the liquor began to flow.

THE BURGER
Please don’t tell my friends in the LAPD, but yes, I took photos, while eating and I drove with my knees. Adam didn’t complain but perhaps that was the double double he was shoving into his face. In-N-Out knocks fast food out of the park. The burgers are made fresh, their made fast and they have been that way since 1948. When on the West Coast, I heavily suggest getting some.

For our full In-N-Out review, click here.


7 out of 10 ounces
-Rev Ciancio

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Bill’s Bar – Hater’s Be Damned

Posted on 01/15/2010 by Rev

Bill’s Bar
http://www.billsbarandburger.com/
22 Ninth Ave
New York, NY 10014

THE CONQUEST
On this Sunny Friday afternoon in January, I found myself craving a burger. I’m sure you laugh and think that goes through my head every day. However, this time was different. I’ve been on a post holiday “diet” and working out like a madman. This morning at the gym I noticed that I had lost 7 pounds. Feeling pretty good about my accomplishment, I decide to justify this craving with a reward burger. After much go between on the Burger Conquest Twitter whether to hit the Shake Shack or Bill’s Bar, it’s decided; Adam, the Meat God and I are going to Bill’s Bar.

Now the last time that Bill’s Bar got Burger Conquested, was a very special event. We hosted The First Ever Burger Conquest Costume Burger Ball and it was a blast. Since then, I have been dying to go back to this B.R. Guest restaurant in NYC’s meat packing district.

THE BURGER
With no delay, the Meat God ordered an Oreo shake, onion rings and a “Sunset and Vine” burger. “I knew what I was getting before I came here” he proclaimed. The pressure was on. I started with an order of the Texas Brisket Chili; Brisket, Bacon, Beans and a lot of Spices, topped with Onions, Diced Cheddar, Sour Cream. Because I wanted to maintain some semblance of health, I ordered sans sour cream. (Go ahead laugh.) The chili was fantastic! The red onions and the sweetness of the barbecued brisket made for a really unique chili taste. It wasn’t very spicy but it certainly was robust with flavor. I would definitely recommend it to the curious. Be warned though, it’s a hearty portion. Get it to share.

Curious to try something different, I also ordered the “Sunset and Vine,” which is a “Bill’s Classic” with Cheese topped with Lettuce and Special Sauce. Again, trying to make healthier decisions, I asked for it on a whole wheat bun. As the patties at Bill’s are thin and cooked smashed style, it doesn’t take too long for them to arrive. I took my first bite without the sauce just to confirm, that yes, Bill’s makes a fresh, delicious and flavorful burger. It’s not too greasy but it is a little juicy. The sauce however, is quite unique. I thought it had a smoky peanut butter taste but the server confirmed it was a BBQ / mayo based concoction. Whatever it is they put in it, they should bottle and sell it! I must say, the whole wheat bun was better than the white, not only in taste but also in strength. The bottom buns at Bill’s have a tendency to fall apart from all the toppings and the juice but the whole wheat held strong throughout the sandwich.

I know the critics are tied and while some love Bill’s, there are some haters and to them I say “are you out of your freakin’ minds?!??!” This being my 3rd burger at Bill’s, I can firmly tell you, this place is fantastic. So you know what, go ahead and hate it. That just means more Bill’s for me and Bronar!


8 out of 10 ounces
-Rev Ciancio


Posted in Burgers, Gourmet Burgers, Hamburgers, New York | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Zombie Burger Attack – Assualt With A Deadly Condiment

Posted on 01/13/2010 by Rev

For the most part, Burger Conquest is about, well as the site says, “The Glorious Pursuit of Delicious Burgers,” but sometimes we find things worth sharing. I love horror movies and spent a serious amount of my teenage years watching volumes and volumes of them. This has stuck with me ever since and still enjoy a good fright flick. I also, as you know, love burgers but but rarely do the 2 meet…UNTIL NOW!!

El ataque de las Zombiehamburguesas
(Zombie Burger Attack in English) – a short film created by the students at the University of Buenos Aires. It’s all in Spanish but you don’t need to speak the language to get the story.

I’ve experience food coma but never like this!! Since I believe in MFZAR (Mother F@#kin Zombies Are Real), I am glad to say I now know how to beat them should this actually go down. Will someone please ask Max Brooks to add this on the next appendage to the Zombie Survival Guide?

Posted in Burgers | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

The Abbey Burger Bistro – Freedom of Choice in Federal Hill

Posted on 01/09/2010 by Rev

The Abbey Burger Bistro
http://www.abbeyburgerbistro.com
1041 Marshall Street
Baltimore, MD 21230

THE CONQUEST
Every first Saturday of the year, my friends Jim, RAM and I travel down to Baltimore to visit our friend Matt. Once the trip was locked in, the search for a Burger to be Conquested began. After many web searches, a flip through Hamburger America and even an email to the Burgeratti, I came up with a big fat goose egg. With no dart board in site, I took what appeared to be the top 3 most talked about and asked Matt. He picked The Abbey Burger Bistro as it was nearest to where we had planned on going out that evening.

Located in Baltimore’s Federal Hill section, The Abbey Burger Bistro replaced the Sky Lounge, a hipster laden tango bar that served tapas. I had never been there but sounds like it was a good riddance. The Abbey is essentially a gastropub located at the end of an alley. The downstairs is relatively small with only about 10 tables, wood tables, floor and bar, exposed brick and flat screen TVs.

Selection is the name of the game here. Choose from diverse and large list of draft and bottled beers from around the world while peruse the massive burger creations list. Between the multiple choices of meat (beef, chicken, lamb, turkey, wild boar, ostrich, veggie, portabello mushroom and even wild boar) the plethora of toppings and buns, there are a possible 32,760 combination available. Just grab the “build-a-burger checklist” and mark off what you like. It reminded me very much of an British style pub version The Counter Burger in LA but with 10x less toppings (note: The Counter Burger offers 312,120 possible combination’s.)

Are you not the decisive type? Do you freeze up with too many choices? Not too worry. The Abbey offers a straight forward menu with pre-selected burger combos known as “house specialties.” With a delicious half-yard of Belgian Kwak, Not wanting to miss out on the perfect selection I began to peruse my burger options.

THE BURGER
As my mind ran through the choices all I could picture was a slot machine with spinning wheels. I grabbed the one arm bandit and waited to see which toppings they would stop on. But something kept bringing me back to the first burger on the house’s specialty list: Harry’s Bistro Burger, a beef burger that included bacon, Lincolnshire Cheddar cheese, and a fried egg, sunny side up, on an English muffin with a side of onion rings. The temptation of burger patties made locally grown Roseda Black Angus beef was too great to avoid. I did however give it my own twist; I replaced the English muffin with a pretzel roll.

If you have never had a burger on a pretzel roll, you my friend, are missing out. I love me a potato roll and I would be hard pressed to turn down an English muffin but this bread was made for a burger. The name says it all, it’s literally a roll made in the same process as a soft pretzel. It’s warm, buttery and with a hint of sugar. Some might say the flavor is too strong and over powering but when encasing a salty beef patty, sharp cheese and a rich egg, it made for a balance of heavenly creation.

Not only did they ask how I wanted my burger cooked (medium-rare) but they also asked how I wanted to the egg prepared (over medium.) I knew I was headed for a righteous treat. The beef was tender, juicy, cooked perfectly and had the exact kind of flavor you want out of a thick pub-style burger like they serve at the Abbey. The yolk burst and started to run down the sandwich. My eyes lit up and I dipped the whole sandwich right into it. Oh man. So good. Every bite was pure dippy egg burger joy.

Every one’s personalities really come out in a situation like this. Not a one of us ordered anything like the other. Jim got a lamb burger with bacon, cheese and waffle fries. The RAM got 2 burgers, one wrapped in lettuce, with cheese onions and waffle fries. Matt ordered his with fried onions, mushrooms and a side of sweet potato fries. The best thing about the diversity in side car ordering, we all got to try each of them. The sweet potato fries were the winner in my mind. They were long, crispy and had the great sweet / salty mix you would expect. The onion rings has a lighter batter and were less crunchy than most of their brethren. Rather than relying on grease and breading to give them flavor, the real taste was in the actual batter. I was impressed.


8 out of 10 ounces
-Rev Ciancio



Posted in Bar, Beer, Burgers, Gourmet Burgers, Hamburgers, Maryland | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Hodad’s – Tell Me Why I Have To Be A Burger Slave

Posted on 12/31/2009 by Rev

Hodad’s
http://www.hodadies.com
5010 Newport Avenue
San Diego, CA 92107

THE CONQUEST
I think it started with baseball cards, but it might’ve been comic books or matchbook cars. Then it was He-Man and G.I. Joe figures, Atari games, Garbage Pail Kids, Star Wars figures and eventually LPs, cassettes, CDs, DVDs, photos and now, it’s all about the burgers. What the hell am I talking about? The time line of my life of collecting.

Now, before you start comparing me to the extremely unwatchable folks on the TV show Hoarders, know that I’ve grown out of most of these (not music) and have aspirations for godliness, as it pertains to cleanliness. At this point, my obsession with burgers isn’t just about finding the best one(s) but it’s also about finding ALL of them. Thankfully there are more great burgers out there than I could possibly hope to devour.

While the NYC area is a conquest all it’s own, I have come to appreciate what “the Golden State” brings to the butcher’s table. As much as I hate to admit it, California is all about the burger. So when I find myself on the west coast, getting a burger is top priority. The 13 burgers I ate in California in 2009 is proof! When the wife and I decided to visit our friends Karl and Julie in San Diego for New Year’s Eve, I knew exactly how I wanted to celebrate the holiday.

Enter Hodad’s. Originally opening in 1969, Hodad’s was located right off the water in Ocean Beach, CA. In 1991 they re-opened at their current location at the corner of Newport Avenue and (wait for it) BACON STREET! Stop for a moment and appreciate that because once you eat the bacon they put on their burgers…scroll down for more on that.

So who is this Mr. Hodad who found the perfect burger cross streets? He doesn’t exist. The place was started by the Hardin family who eventually passed it on to 2nd generationer (is that a word?) Mike “Boss Man” Hardin. So what the hell is up with the name? You’ll find the answer printed right on the menu; hodad noun – a nonsurfer who spends time at beaches masquerading as a surfer. See also “poser”.

What else is on the menu? Burgers. Minis, single or double burgers…and that is it. Well other than fries and rings and the option to have as much of all of the above for only $100. The burgers are served in a simple presentation — wrapped in plastic paper and beers come in their natural casing (bottles) or if on tap, in mason jars.

So step on in, right off the beach if you like because at Hodad’s “no shoes, no shirt…no problem.” However, be prepared to wait in a long line for your burger. We waited nearly 90 minutes and you know what? It was freaking worth it. As we got nearer to the entrance of the open air restaurant something got me really, REALLY excited. Was it the smell of delicious burgers? Well yes, but that is not what I am talking about here. Was itthe ridiculously large collection of strange license plates and surfboards covering the walls? How about the fun looking VW microbus parked out side or the front end of another one fashioned into a 2 person booth inside the restaurant? Nope, it was none of these.

Although the crowd who had gathered to patronize Hodad’s was truly a real slice of the cornucopia of ages, colors, sizes and beliefs of the people of San Diego, they were blasting IRON FRIKKING MAIDEN!! And not a person seemed to be bothered by it what so ever. Me, I was fist pounding, air guitaring and singing along with the sheer excitement of great metal leading me to great burgers.

But I digress…

THE CONQUEST
Menu’s are offered at the door due to the massive volume of burger lovers so you can be prepared to order upon being shown your seat. We thankfully got seated right at the bench in the front window and before the waiter could even ask, I was ready; a double with cheese, bacon, lettuce and mustard. Regularly they also come with ketchup, mayo, pickles and tomatoes but I have no time for that business. I had originally considered getting 2 separate burgers until Cara and Karl ordered rings and fries to share.

I was sipping on a mason jar of beer, enjoying the heavy metal jams and the warm beach air as the rings arrived first. Careful not too dig in too deeply I had only 2. They were heavily breaded in a crispy, crunchy, yet airy batter that held together as you bit all the way through. They were damn good but easy little Rev, easy, you have a bacon double coming at you.

Holy moly! This burger was so big, I was surprised it wasn’t also zipped tied into the wax paper! This is a full two-handed burger and only a trained individual, such as me, could pull off the feat of a left hand grab photo. But how else was I going to get you a picture? A couple of bites confirmed, this burger was not here to mess around. The bacon, ohhhhhh man, the bacon! It was so good and not like your ordinary bacon. The size of this salted and cured pork was less described as a rasher and more like a slab! Apparently there is some secret cooking process to making the bacon that even those who are shown the method, still have trouble comprehending. I would’ve waited just as long just to eat it.

Lucky me, the beef itself was clearly made from high quality fresh ground meat, with the intended purpose of becoming one of the world’s most sought after burgers. It’s served on a large, soft, sesame seed bun, with shredded lettuce, large white onion slices and some melted cheese. The juicy, delicious, double patty of beef was absolutely a taste sensation and after only a few bites, it was clear to me what needed to be done. I turned the burger upside down so I got more of the flavor of the cheese and the bacon with every bite. Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the move. You can thank me later. While we’re at it, do not miss out on the fries, if they could really be called by that name. These chunky slices of deep fried potatoes are more like well done, tangy, seasoned, long potato wedges.

As I rounded up to the last couple of bites of the burger, my stomach was sending me signals to stop, but there was no stopping, there was only Zuul. (Karl / Cara – see what I did there?) All this and the San Diego Zoo all in one day? I’ll take good friends, great weather, giant pandas, kissing otters, humping monkeys and a legendary burger over freezing weather and a 12,000 pound crystal ball dropping any new years.


9 out of 10 ounces
-Rev Ciancio




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Continental Airlines 1st Class Cabin Flight 738 – When Cows Fly

Posted on 12/30/2009 by Rev

Continental Airlines 1st Class Cabin
http://www.continental.com
Flight from IAH to SAN

THE CONQUEST
My wife and I were flying Continental Airlines from Detroit to San Diego to visit some friends of ours for New Years Eve. We had to change planes in Houston and decided to get a bite on our layover. Throughout the holidays we had been eating as though it was the first time we had ever seen food so in trying to make a healthy choice, we both got salads.

As we boarded the flight, much to our surprise, we both got upgraded into first class seats. I jokingly said to Cara, “watch, after we tried to be all healthy, we’re gonna get served a NY Strip steak like our friend Joe C from SteakClub7.” When the stewardess came around to take our lunch order she said, “today we have corn chowder soup and your choice of a salad with grilled chicken or we have an Angus cheese burger.” We both laughed.

As it’s my journalistic duty to advise you on burgers, I went against my better health needs and ordered the burger. I hope you appreciate it.

THE BURGER
A few moments later we were snacking on an appetizer of almonds and sipping a tiny glass a of wine. The flight attendant then brought us our lunch trays (burger for me, salad for my smarter half.) The corn chowder was good and as it’s named stated, corn was most certainly the overwhelming flavor.

The burger looked pretty appetizing. The patty appeared to be juicy and charbroiled. I asked the flight attendant if she knew how the burger was prepared and if it was fresh or frozen. She informed me that they come precooked and other than re-heating it, she knew nothing else. The burger was served on a sesame seed bun with a slice of cheese on the bottom (just how I like it) along with a little tray of toppings and a mustard and ketchup packet. I slathered on some some mustard, added the red onions and went in for a bite. Hmm. Not bad. It had a natural salty beef flavor, the bun was decent and the cheese was as well.

Another couple of bites and I was finally able to place what was humming around in the back of my mind; this burger tasted almost exactly like an Deluxe style Angus Third Pounder from McDonald’s! I’m not saying it WAS a McDonald’s Angus Third Pounder but it looked like one and it tasted like one! The toppings and bun were even the same! In fact, I would bet that if you put the Continental First Class Cabin Burger next to a McDonald’s Angus Third Pounder in a blind taste test and I wouldn’t know one from the other.

Was it the best burger I have ever had? No. But I certainly am hoping I get served it every time I fly Continental again!

As with most Continental Meals, a dessert was included. For this on in particular, it was a Cookies and Cream Brownie. Now I’ve eaten a lot of brownies in my life but never one that was basically infused with an Oreo cookie. There wasn’t even time for curiosity to find the cat, much less locate it before I tore open the wrapped and took a bite. Wow. It was sweet, moist and had a delicious mix of sweet tastes. If it came to a vote to change the brownie standard from chocolate to cookies and cream, you could count on my vote!


6 out of 10 ounces
-Rev Ciancio


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